I’m trying to figure out what sort of future you have planned out where being elected into student government office is of any importance whatsoever. All the future law office assistants, I guess, are out in full today. I was assaulted twice today by the vote-for-me crowd (three times, if you want to count the just-plain-vote people. And they were pretty annoying, so I do). The first table tackled me outside the library. The actual candidate was nowhere to be seen, even though her name is really stupid and she should hang around to defend it, but she’s put what looks like her grandmother and younger brother to work for her, so, ok. I got a sticker slapped on my chest (which may have really been an issue! Had I any boobs to speak of at all. Still, kind of rude). And a giant flyer. And a bagel offer (which I turned down, because, ew, bagels). And a tiny little lollipop which was actually enough to fully placate me. I even took off the sticker discretely and didn’t throw the flyer away till I rounded a corner.

The second group didn’t even have any foodstuffs to offer. What the fuck is that? Also, I suspect the guy running is more joking around than anything, because his card says “the future is now!” and that can’t really be said seriously, can it? Still, he was there. And very tall. And kinda pretty. And he had a cute sort of smile when he said “vote for me?” “visit my website?” Not that I’m going to vote for him, even if it is a big joke, which would be great. Still, when I walked away I tucked the card into my pocket. Because I’m a big slut.