cast of Rock the Cradle

A commenter in my last post asked, “What is Rock the Cradle?” I’d like to be able to answer that using words alone, but have found that I can’t capture the horror of it fully without sound and image reinforcement.

Rock the Cradle an MTV show about aspiring musicians. It’s a competitive reality show where all the contestants sing, and each week one or two are eliminated by public vote – yes, another American Idol rip-off. Except, all of these contestants are extra-extra special, because they’re all sons and daughters of “famous” (?), established musicians already. Really, it’s just a forum for people to judge celebrities’ kids. None of the kids are particularly talented as far as I can tell, but they can be amusing to watch. I’m not going to put up any clips of them singing, because I’m not that mean, but here are the commercials for the show before they started airing (I think they say it all).

The final four:


And, I know I said I wouldn’t have them sing, but how could I not show you Jesse Blaze? Actually, he’s entertaining and all but what I really wanted was a clip of poor Chloe. I’m going to root for her to win just because she is probably a bit less than sane. I say that fondly (after watching someone very nearly break down every week for howevermany weeks, how can you not be fond of them? Come on, now).

Jesse Blaze Snider, singing “Prisoner of Society” by Living End. Well, after a lot of tense pauses and the announcement of who’s going home. The clip is really too long (I would skip the first few minutes and the last few minutes), but I included it because Jessie takes his shirt off, flips (literally), ect. No, I don’t find this attractive, but watching Thursday night I kept staring at the screen incredulously. Like, seriously? But that’s, I guess, what this show is all about.

The finale is Thursday May 8 at ten PM East Coast time (this is barely a sentence, isn’t it?). I’ll probably be tuning in, sadly, so I guess they did something right with marketing and hypnosis or whatever they did to get me watching. I think Crosby will probably end up winning, and he’s likable and seems nice enough. But I still would prefer a Chloe win (though I think Jesse Blaze, though a ridiculous person, probably wants it just as much as her, if not more, and they both seem more invested than Crosby to me).

The drama!!1!

You can watch full episodes of this hot tranny mess on the official website.